2016-10-01

Well, so much for a regular diary, huh?

It sure is nice being a Daddy. I'm so proud of the way everyone growing up.

Brucina, you and Rama are nuts. It is so kool the way you two conspire together to make mischief. I like how we play all the time hahaaaahahhaaa. It is really kool how both of you take such joy in doing things you are not supposed to be doing. The way you like to be bad reminds me of Tony Yuhasz, one of the men I named you after. I knew you would be handful. I wouldn't have it any other way.

I'm here in AZ now doing a big migration. It is hard being so far away from you and Rove and everyone else and 2 months really rips my heart out. Sometimes I hang my head from the depression of not being with my family but when I pick it up again I feel the fire and determination to do my absolute best for my family. And for myself. I'm blessed to be doing what I truly love to do.

It is well true that I can do this type of work from anywhere. Even now I am doing a very critical part of this migration from my hotel room on a Saturday while I am ssh'd into the development machine on-site. There are minute things that ya just gotta be here on the ground for. One of the most important things is the personal relationships that you can maintain in person. You can't do that over the phone or Skype. People just can't feel you the same way if you are half a planet away. In business, you have to be Mr. Right and you have to be Mr. RightNow at the same time. I'm sorry it took me so long to learn this. It's not just about the product. Support is everything. Remember that. It took your daddy 4 years to learn that one. When you get in business, you will have saved yourself 4 years by learning that one from me.

I look at you and Rama and Charm and Zackie and wonder what you kids will actually be doing when you grow up. Somehow everyone ends up finding their place in life. I wonder where yours will be? I hope you end up doing what you love also. I also hope we are giving you a happy childhood. Neither Rove nor I grew up in the most loving homes. Rove's situation was worse than mine. Both of us want our kids to come up in a warm, loving, safe family.

Sure couldn't do anything without your mother. She is a rock. I hope through enough hard work that maybe one day we can have a good lifestyle in America. I don't pray much but I pray for this. Never worked harder for these things.

Back to work...

2015-07-05

Hey kids,

This is my first post to this blog. I'm going to try to keep a regular diary going so that you can read it one day and hopefully it will help guide you in your parenting decisions or at least let you know what you are in for. :)

Today started out going to Carbon market with Charm. We needed 4 batons for school. Had a really nice time bonding at the Starbucks and hopefully setting an example that a good walk isn't a bad thing. Physical activity isn't a bad thing. Don't be afraid to park the car and go for a walk. Especially if we got a cool breeze. Today was nice for that. We traveled all around this country but how often we get a cool breeze in the middle of the day? I'm so looking forward to learning Korean with you. This is a very big thing for me and I will be researching some more on some ways we can get some classes and exposure to the culture here.

Had to swat Brucina on the hand a coupla times today to get her attention. Toni, I hope you know that I'm just trying to get your attention when I do that. It's hard to maintain discipline and respect. I needed you to stop what you were doing and pay attention to me. I need you to have a strong, indominable spirit in life. Especially in this place. Ya just can't be getting into some things. I love the way you ate that chicken today and made a big mess. Lemme tell ya, Daddy hates cleaning up your messes but some of them are really funny so it's ok. I'm very proud of how smart you are but a little scared too because I can see your strong-willed nature and lack of patience. I don't know what you will be like in school. Somehow, I dont think you will fit in well with people here. I hope you do, though. Not fitting in was hard for me. I like how you make friends so fast with other kids. I can see you are very compassionate and I'm very proud of that.

Zackie, you're tossing and turning and talking in your sleep while I write this. I wish you knew more English. I'm very proud of the stuff you can do on a computer. I saw you running the cafe in the market the other day. Nice work.

Rama you are only 8 months old so you didn't do alot today. I sure like how happy you were when Daddy was holding you and dipping you upside down for a sec and then bringing you back up. Funny how you didnt want me to hold you for a little bit and clung back to Teresa.  You're a trip. I can't wait for you to grow more so I can get your personality and we can have fun. I can see you are so smart.

So hard to see you stressed on that house, Rove. I hope some of my suggestions make it go easier. I want you to know that your health and happiness are a lot more important to me than anything we got going on. If something seems too big to take on, then lets simplify and make it easy. I lost one wife already to a nervous breakdown, I'm not going let that happen to you. You are not in this alone. Know that we are in it together and that I might remain quiet a lot but that's just because years of micromanaging as taught me that if I kinda let things happen, they won't happen as perfectly as they would if I micromanaged them, but they'll happen with a whole lot less stress. I have learned to accept something that is 90% right and I only had to manage it 5% of the time than 100% perfect but I had to give it 100% of my time and energy, paying attention to every tiny detail and being so damn sick of it that it wasn't worth it. Gimme a car with a few scratches, I don't care as long as it can get me to the mall.

Rob